Day 6

Monday, June 7, 2010 (Siwa, Egypt) – We conquered Siwa today, and it was extraordinary.

The hotel provided breakfast, and we got a taste of the area. It started with pita bread and some sort of cheese that was like cream cheese with four pounds of salt in every shmear (thank you einsteinbros.com for providing the proper spelling). Next, they put down the usual assortment of jams on the table: apricot, olive and carrot. The apricot wasn’t disgusting.

We were concerned about not having enough food for the day, so I actually ate the beans, which most of you probably realize is the kind of texture I cannot stand. We each ordered an omelets, which was really just one omelet split four ways, and we washed it down with Nescafe, marking perhaps the first time in my life I was happy to have instant coffee.

Honestly, I tried it all, and I’m glad I did. But I’m not likely to order any of it again.

The day improved quickly, when we headed to Gabel al-Mawta, the Mountain of the Dead. Although I’m from Colorado, I’m not even going to make a crack about the tiny hill being called a mountain – mostly because it was unbelievable.

Now, when we were kids, Mom took Darren and me (and sometimes big brother David) to Antioch Park, where they had this little play city, where we would spend hours entertaining ourselves. This morning, we took the boys to ancient ruins that were way cooler than some miniature banks and hotels.

The hill is probably about 100-150 high, but there are tombs everywhere we looked. I was hesitant at first, because in the U.S., every one of these things would have been roped off and guarded. But here, there is just so much history that nobody seems to even notice. Calvin and Sammy went down in one of the tombs and I stayed up, thinking it was going to be another single room and they’d be back soon. After a few minutes, I went down to find them and ended up crawling through a hole in the wall. There were passageways leading in just about every direction with what clearly used to be tombs lining the sides.

A few of the tombs had locked doors, which the guard opened for us (for a moderate baksheesh). We went into the Tomb of Si Amun, Tomb of Mesu-Isis, Tomb of Niperpathot and Tomb of the Crocodile. Each one had paintings that dated back to the 26th Dynasty, Ptolemaic and Roman times (according to the always trustworthy Lonely Planet). I don’t know quite how to describe these things, other than to say that I saw the King Tut traveling exhibit once, and these four tombs probably had more artifacts and were definitely cooler (and not behind glass).

Scattered throughout the Mountain were human bones. Darren picked up what we figured was a femur that was lying near his feet. Others were imbedded in the dirt all around. So much for a final resting place.

Last night during dinner, we arranged a tour of the surrounding desert. We were a little skeptical because the price was higher than we expected ($150 for the four of us? Are you out of your mind? Wait, I think I paid that for a half-day rafting trip once in Colorado, and that was just me.) and the guy in charge seemed to be downplaying what we would be doing.

The four of us loaded into the back of a truck with benches along the sides and a cover on top. My first thought, of course, was, “How the hell hot is this day going to be?” I got in anyway.

We drove around the large lake just outside of town that forms the center of the Siwa Oasis. After about 45 minutes, the guide turned to us to say that we had a very special surprise , which made the two boys excited and made Darren and I cringe.

Sure enough, the big surprise was that we got to see the other hotel that was part of our hotel group. Although Darren protested, we took a look anyway.

I’ve got to say, it was a pretty cool place, even if it was in the middle of nowhere and could only be accessed by 4-wheel-drive. There entire complex was built ecofriendly and blended right in with the surroundings. There was no electricity, so candles were scattered around the room we looked at. All the furniture was made of salt. No really. The guide told us that if you spill a glass of water, the thing pretty much disintegrates.

Anyway, as I’ve said, I don’t speak a lick of Arabic, so there’s a possibility that I now own an awesome timeshare in Siwa. Let me know if anyone is interested in taking my week next year.

We drove for quite some time, stopping at various points in the desert. From about 15 minutes into the drive, I had absolutely no concept of where I was or which direction I was pointed. There was sand everywhere, and I’m talking Lawrence of Arabia sand. I don’t know how else to explain it (although some great photos will follow).

We stopped at a focalized footprint that was probably a couple thousand (or more) years old, although Darren and I were more interested in the fact that we were within spitting distance of the Libyan border (no Mom, we didn’t stop in for tea with Kaddafi).

We drove a little more through the sand dunes, and the driver gradually got a little more daring. Needless to say, driving through sand is kind of like driving a boat, and it always feels like you’re moving faster than if you were in a car.

Especially when you’re going over the tops of giant sand dunes. We seriously got to the point a few times where the truck was vertical. Darren even got out one time to try to take pictures of it, and returned to the truck wide-eyed after watching it from afar. I haven’t checked the pictures yet, but I seriously doubt you could capture the insanity in a photograph (I hope I’m wrong).

Let’s just say that all of us were pretty much scared out of our minds the first few times, but we got a little more courageous as the day went on. Well, the kids were more courageous. I was pretty nervous most of the ride.

After another hour or so of seeing sand everywhere, we crested a dune and saw a saltwater oasis appear out of nowhere. As we were swimming, all of us started imagining wandering around the desert and discovering a lush pond, and then realizing that you couldn’t drink any of the water.

We dried off, and they had lunch ready for us. It was much better than breakfast, although Darren is still shocked that I ate it.

You have to understand. I was about as picky as they come while I was growing up. There was a Christmas when my grandfather gave each of us $100, which was more money than any of us could have even imagined. Darren and David went out and bought camera equipment or something else that Grandfather was pleased to hear about.

Me? Throughout the rest of Christmas Break that year, if my family was eating something I didn’t care for, I’d quietly get up from the table, grab the phone and order a pizza. My parents are still incredulous about the whole thing, but I enjoyed every cent of that $100.

And, for the record, Grandfather never gave me money as a gift again. I’m not sure why.

Anyway, they served us fresh cucumbers and tomatoes mixed with feta cheese and canned tuna. I’m not a fan of canned tuna, but I had a little anyway (I was famished after breakfast), and I really enjoyed the salad. Finally, I found a sort of Egyptian dish that I liked.

The tour does it right. For those of you that have put on a shirt after swimming in salt water, you know that prickly sensation you get. It’s not all that appealing. So, next they took us to a freshwater oasis, where we swam for quite a while (and knocked all the salt off, which was nice).

As we were drying off in the desert breeze, I realized that I had not been hot at all today. I really imagined this part of the country being brutally hot, but when I asked the guide, he said it was generally about like this. It may actually be drier than Denver, if that’s even possible (although the dryness probably would not surprise anyone), and there was generally a breeze. I have no idea what the temperature was today, but I imagine it was hovering around triple digits, and I hardly noticed.

The final oasis was hot water with a strong smell of sulfur and temperatures that were not conducive to swimming. We didn’t stay long.

Throughout the day, the truck would stop at various points, and we would all look at each other wondering if it was time for the guys to take all our stuff and leave us for dead. Instead, each time they would point out something amazing. One time it was a pile of rocks that could be used to light fires (and looked an awful lot like a meteorite that crashed to earth). Another was a field of quartz or something similar that the wind and sand somehow formed in ample amounts in a concentrated area no more than about a quarter mile. Lastly, we stopped at a field of fossils – seashells, a couple starfish, apparently someone discovered the remains of a whale in the area (which we did not see).

Think about that, in the middle of one of the oldest deserts in the world, near one of the oldest cities in the world, were the remains of sea life.

Our final stop was atop a large sand dune that overlooked the big lake and Siwa itself. As we waited for the sun to drop behind the hills and sand dunes, we did what anyone would do. We jumped on a sandboard and started shredding. OK, maybe no shredding.

Some of you have probably heard about this, but it’s basically snowboarding on sand. And it’s pretty fun (perhaps I thought so because I’ve never actually tried snowboarding and kept wiping out). The kids got on the thing headfirst and shot down the dune on their bellies. I tried the same approach on my second attempt. I found it much easier, but I swallowed a good portion of the Western Desert and had to yard sale at the bottom, fearing that otherwise I would continue gliding into the endless sea of sand.

The sun set, and we headed back for dinner and showers. Another very successful day in the books.